Night makes me so contemplative, especially the nights as breezy as these, heralding the beginning of winter. As i take steps outside, I see a plane flying overhead..Humanity is never at rest and the dark, brooding silence is forever broken by activities of mankind. It is amazing as how many thoughts pass through your head and how many people sweep past memories, people who live in different parts of the world, totally cut off from you, yet so deeply known to you.

 

A sad day for me as I was stormed by news that the person who styled my hair has committed suicide. he was facing marital problems and as he confided in me going through divorce. In fact, some days back I had received his call and he had apologised for not keeping the appointment as he was feeling low and unable to work due to personal problems. I had told him not to worry about my hair and concentrate on solving his problems as i can get them cut anytime when he is fine. Then in between I changed my number and as he was supposed to call and inform me, he must have tried and not able to reach. The news hit me so hard because as I know him, he was not a person to die in this manner. I wont judge him at all as why he didnt think of his children (i have taught them during my brief stint in school and I can vouch that there can not be better children than them). I respect the man and his talents so deeply that I wont judge him or pose any questions. I am so sad that I still can not believe it to be truth.. But he will remain alive for me through my pictures that have been cllicked after I sat in the chair leaving my hair to his artistry. I will miss him and sigh that I never shared a cup of coffee at his saloon as he always invited me for and also I refused to lend my face and hair for an ad for his saloon, the reason being I am awfully scared of public limelight. 

 

Now only memories will remain and all the moments will come rushing and the conversations we shared over the haircut session will return. I feel the remorse for his children as well, who lost a father in such a manner. How unpredictable our lives are and how we keep our heads so messed up when we dont know what our next moment would bring for us. We must pause and hold the moment alive and thank life for IT being in us. The tears flow copiously as I think of the moment that must have led him to take such a drastic step. I must allow them to flow by otherwise the sadness will persist and consume me more. I fear death, I find it scary to think of death although I know we all must die and this is the only truth of our existence. Yet I am one person who fears death, despite accepting its truth.

 

Here is one post that I wrote as a dedication to his finesse long time back: